Earlier this week I was chatting to one of the people inside my goal getting course School of Champions. I was helping her to get clear on what she wanted to achieve and to identify the reasons why she wanted to achieve it – a crucial step that many people overlook or don’t bother with when setting their own goals.
Jane (not her real name) explained that she was finding it hard to commit to her goal because the reasons she wanted to achieve it came from a place of fear.
She asked me:
“Don’t I need to make sure I’m always coming from a place that’s positive?”
I know, I know, I’m always talking about the positive side of things! And yes, we should always do what we can to reframe our challenges to find the positive. But sometimes we can use fear and negativity to help us get to positive places.
Let me explain.
Almost every decision we make is based on two desires: the desire to avoid pain or the desire to gain pleasure. These desires fuel our motivation.
This is a powerful thing to know when chasing your goals, and it’s especially important to remember when you’re getting clear on the reasons why you want to achieve that goal.
You might want to lose weight so you don’t shuffle off this great mortal coil before you see your daughter walk down the aisle. Maybe you want to finish your uni degree because you’ve told everyone you would and you don’t want to be embarrassed if you don’t.
These reasons seem negative but they are powerful and compelling motivators.
People say things like “Never let your fear decide your future” but having negative or fear-based reason for achieving your goal doesn’t make you a negative or scared person.
Someone much wiser than me put this concept in some pretty words:
You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing which you think you cannot do.
– Eleanor Roosevelt
So, use your fear. Use your negative experiences.
Look your fear in the face and do the thing you think you cannot do – Tweet it!
Over to you, I wanna hear about you. Let me know what you’re chasing here.
PS – Don’t want to miss my posts? I don’t blame ya! Pop your details here so I can let you know the next time I share a strategy like this one.
Thanks. Turia you always inspire me. ?
Just needed to read those words today Turia. Thankyou. My closest friends and family believe that I am suited to a career in real estate sales (of high end property). While I am just 60 years old, I feel late 40’s, in that I have experienced a lot, mixed with a variety of personality types, and pretty much get on with everyone. I just don’t know why I don’t want to pursue this career, even though it is one of the only jobs where being “older” in this career is viewed as advantageous. Maybe its fear?