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Mindset StrategiesPerspective

The choice we all get to make

By April 4, 2019 19 Comments

l tripped over last week.

Not a small “lost my balance and stumbled” sort of trip. Like a big, cartwheeling, scene-causing, ass-over-head fall.

I was walking through North Sydney, on the hunt for a coffee. The rain was hammering down around me and I was in a hurry.

Earlier, I’d been at the Today Show talking about my new book for kids, Good Selfie, and I had a full day of events and interviews planned. So, I was in a good mood. I was excited to be talking about the book, and I felt pretty cool because I was wearing this sick new outfit, I’d just met The Wiggles and I had my hair and makeup done. You know, all the important stuff 😂.

So there I am, hustling down the street when my new sneakers, dazzling white and about as slippery as a buttered balloon, slide through a rivulet of rainwater and I go F-L-Y-I-N-G.

No joke, I think I flipped about twice before landing smack on my back, a bit winded, with a huge graze on my knee.

I was absolutely mortified.

Several people rushed to my aid and helped me up and, feeling super rattled, I started to cry.

But I looked over at my colleague Grace, who had been walking with me, and saw that she was doubled over in hysterical laughter.

She was laughing so much she could barely get the words “Are you OK?” out of her mouth without snorting.

So, I had a choice to make.

I could either cry, and feel embarrassed and let it put a dampener on my day, or I could laugh it off.

I chose to laugh.
I cleaned myself up. I got my coffee and I went on with my day.

So, why tell you this mildly embarrassing story?

Because I want to say this: while bad, annoying, frustrating and embarrassing things will happen to us from time to time, we always have a choice in how we react, yeah?

From the small stuff, like tripping over on the street, to the bigger stuff – we get to choose how we want to respond. 

In last week’s case, the choice was pretty easy to make.
I wanted to feel better and there was an easy strategy to help me do that – I could laugh it off with Grace.

But it doesn’t really matter HOW I chose to respond – what matters is that I have the choice in the first place.

Choosing the response that makes you feel better, uplifted, happier – that’s ideal. And sometimes you just have to make that choice. You know, you might have a client meeting, or a day out with your kids planned – you might just have to choose to turn it around.

But sometimes it can be really refreshing to say to yourself “You know what, today is really crappy, and I’m not going to try and turn it around. I’m just going to accept it, and know that tomorrow will probably be better.”

That’s something I talk about a lot in Good Selfie.

There’s this expectation that every day we’re gonna be super happy and super energised and super motivated, and that if we don’t feel that way there must be something wrong with us.

But I think that’s just a part of life. 

Just as we have experiences that are awesome, fascinating and extraordinary, we have experiences that are boring, draining and crappy.

So, next time things don’t go as planned at work, or something crappy happens, (or you go flying through the rainy streets of North Sydney) know that you have a choice in how you respond.

Whatever choice you make – either to make yourself feel better, or to wallow a bit – is OK. Either option is fine! But know that you get to make that choice.

I think that’s a really empowering thing to realise.

I’d love to hear your thoughts on this – so sound off in the comments on the blog.

I’d be stoked to hear your take!
Turia x

PS – I’m going LIVE on Instagram next Monday night at 7:30pm.

I’ll be chatting all things confidence and sharing some of my fave strategies and stories from Good Selfie. So, if you have questions you’d like me to answer about how to build more confidence and self-esteem, hit reply and ask me! I’ll pick a few to answer live on Monday.

And, if you’ve got kids or teens, this will be a perfect opportunity to tune in together. See you then!

19 Comments

  • Rosemary says:

    I know when I’m going to have a bad day so just go with it. And usually the next day will be fine.

  • Roslyn Eatts says:

    I totally agree with you, it is how we react to a situation or incident.

    Every day may not be good, but there is always something good in everyday.

  • Nicky says:

    Thank you! I needed to read this today as I’ve been feeling quite down. I decided to take it slow and do some relaxing yoga to calm my mind. X

  • Nyleta Pascoe says:

    Hi Turia – oh I can absolutely relate… had a trip on unmarked kerb recently and did a front face plank….. big egg on forehead, cut nose, but soooo very thankful nothing broken. Horrified to Look like a “bashed wife”!! However, attitude is everything eh? (Old kid’s saying – Stop, Look, & Listen… and slow diwn too) Take care and keep smiling
    Nyleta xo

  • lourdess777 says:

    The Choice
    Wow Turia thank you for sharing your tale of your full on fall in North Sydney . As I was reading I experienced a number of emotions. I travelled through it – not knowing what was going to be the outcome. There was concern, shock and then I was confused by Grace. However
    Thank you – you took the high road made the most uplifting, and most positive choice. Turia you have a beautiful sense of humour – a wicked sense of wit and you are honestly a delight to listen to at the same time incredibly real and down to earth. My respect for you runs very deep and you sharing this happening has reminded me that there is that split second of a split second to make that choice. You are in control. I think you would have made that choice regardless of Grace laughing – you just don’t want to cry for something like that – you are a big girl now and there is a lot happening in the world that is not right. There is a lot of struggle. And you are totally grateful for where you are at in it all.
    I love your grateful lesson.
    Thank you Turia Thank you

  • Tanya Nikolic says:

    Dear Turia,
    Thank you for to the sky and back to remind us to our own vulnerability, to that we are all just a human beings having bad and good days.
    I love you soo much and you are on top of the list of the people who I would love to to meet in this life.
    Tanya

  • Tanya Nikolic says:

    Dear Turia,
    Thank you for to the sky and back to remind us to our own vulnerability, to that we are all just a human beings having bad and good days.
    I love you soo much and you are on top of the list of the people who I would love to to meet in this life.
    Tanya

  • Sheri says:

    I had a similar experience on a rainy day here in Auckland. Unfortunately I didn’t have anyone to laugh with. But I got up cleaned as best I could and went on with my day.

  • Laura says:

    I literally fell hard twice and broke a rib trying to run during a soccer game. I had been lying to everyone as to how it happened since I was so humiliated so your Post was just what I needed today. Thanks for reminding me not to be so hard on my 48yr old self😉

  • Neen says:

    Love it Turia, again you put out a message I needed to hear.

  • Theresa says:

    Thankyou for putting that out there. It reminds me that not all days go as I want. And that it’s normal to have those days.

  • Kerryn says:

    This is such a brilliant message! This really helped me a while back when I felt like I didn’t have control of certain things in my life. It helped me to know that even if it’s two shitty choices- it still means you have a choice. And that is empowering!

    Also, I can be honest here and say, while I’d rush to make sure you were ok, I think I’d be having a similar reaction to Grace.

  • Jane Yost says:

    I needed to hear that, Turia. Last week I fainted in Phoenix airport – dizziness after sitting and eating for an hour, and the next thing i knew was all these faces peering in at me from above. The faint alone would have been resolved by being on the floor, but the real problem was it was a terrazzo floor. Concussion city! I was unconscious for about a minute, then got helped up into a wheelchair, then the paramedics arrived, put me on the gurney, and off through the airport to an ambulance. I was a bit embarrassed, but the photojournalist in me prevailed and between bouts of nausea I determined that this was an unusual experience going through parts of the airport passengers never see, then down onto the tarmac with the planes … all lying down in a bed, not unlike a bad dream waking up and finding yourself in bed in a public place – but at least my bed was moving and had an amazing view. So I decided to video it.

    As mortified as I was that it was me on the floor, me in the wheelchair, me on the gurney, I had to remember that our fallibility is just part of life. We are only human, after all …. Nobody was to know that I had just skiied like a boss lady for 6 days prior to being just a lady lying on the floor … so why not take control back and do the only thing I still could … and record the way I finished out my excellent ski trip! 👊🏻

  • Emma says:

    LOL! Thanks for the laugh – This cracked me up because I too, fell over last week as I was walking across the pedestrian crossing into work. I work in a school and this happened in front of about 25 gawking students who just stopped and stared at me, not one of them offering to help me as I was sitting on my butt in the middle of the road, suit covered in coffee, coffee dripping down my legs – I actually managed to save most of my coffee though, thank God! What else can you do, but laugh? 🙂

  • Valerie says:

    Beautifully said Turia. A bad day just makes a good day that much better!

  • Rebecca says:

    I don’t blame Grace..that is exactly what I would have done too..Laugh at you Turia.Amid saying SORRY laughter would naturally come.
    Now to the lesson of making a choice..you have nailed it my dear.That is a positive thing to do.We can never be perfect and to fall and rise is key.
    The moment we stay down we lose it.
    Good selfie is a book I must get.
    Thanks Turia.
    It is Rebecca from Kenya.

  • Colin Smith says:

    Turia, you are an angel. You quite often have me in tears reading your inspirational words when I’m having a tough time and need lifting. Your power gives us all hope that we can view life as you do. In awe x

  • Sarah Brett says:

    Thank you for your always honest, engaging and inspiring messages Turia. It is often me that is making the spectacle of myself going tits up somewhere or saying really inappropriate and somewhat loud comments (I think your Mum and I would get on well!). I also choose to laugh at myself and not take it all too seriously, and usually those around me are laughing madly too. I do try my best to entertain those I love and work with. In these crazy and often very stressful times I think it is SO important to not sweat the little stuff, but save it for those life and death dramas that present themselves way too often. Thanks again for sharing your positive, helpful and reassuring thoughts with us all.
    Sarah

  • lynn says:

    Love your inspirational thoughts on good and bad and how you take it. After our house burnt down 30 years ago, there was one pink bush of flowers not harmed. In amongst all the devastation. Our family began “The Flowers in The Muck” times. Whenever things are bad we watch out for the good and call them the flowers in the muck. Works for us.

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