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Last week I was in Perth, speaking at an event.

After my session, a man approached me and asked me a question I‘d never been asked before….

We were chatting about Ironman when he asked what made me stick to my decision to compete in Ironman competitions. He said “I imagine there were a lot of people telling you that you shouldn’t do it, and with your injuries it must have been scary. How did you know you’d made the right decision?”

This question kind of floored me.

It floored me because he was spot on. Almost everyone I know questioned me when I said I wanted to take on Ironman. I don’t blame them. When I registered for Ironman, despite being three years after the fire, I couldn’t swim more than 500 metres and the furthest I could run was 4 kilometres (and that distance had nearly done me in!). On top of that I was still in and out of hospital, having pretty major surgeries and of course there were all the other injuries that made Ironman seem almost impossible for me.

I asked myself, more than once, “Is this a good idea?”.

I reckon this is something all of us face, every day. We’ll decide to take on a project, or take a new job, start a new business or decide to do something that feels exciting and scary in our personal lives.

But after that initial rush of excitement dies down, you’re left with some anxiety and that question:

“Did I make the right decision?”

Here’s the thing, I don’t think the “right decision” exists. I think we have to make decisions and then we have to work to make those decisions right.

I think you have to trust yourself and know what is important to you. Because when you know that, decisions start work in your favour.

But there is a little guide I use to check in with myself when making a big decision. Before I take on any big project, I ask myself the following questions:

Will this move me forward?
Will my partner/kids/family/friends be proud of me?
Will I be proud of myself?
Will I sleep well tonight?
If it was published in a national newspaper, would I be ok with it?

If I answer to YES to any of the above questions, I know I’m on the right track. If I hit yes on all five, I know this is something I’ve just GOT to do.

So next time you have a big decision to make, in your career or your personal life, try asking yourself these questions first.

And remember, almost any decision can be the right decision. Show up, back yourself and do the work to see it through. – Tweet it!

Let me know in the comments about a time you’ve worked through the fear of ‘making the wrong decision’. I’d love to hear from you!

Turia xx

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Join the discussion 13 Comments

  • Jo Fisher says:

    Hey Turia,

    Firstly, thanks for your great blog, I saw you speak recently at the ActewAGL InspireCo event and since then i’ve susbribed to your blog and read your book over the course of about 2 weeks…a massive thing for me, because it usually takes me ages to read books (i’m quick to nod off!) 🙂

    I recently made the decision to permanently accept a role here in ActewAGL as a Business Transformation Manager. I have a background in HR and have mainly worked in this area for the last 10 years. I’d been acting in the transformation manager role over the last 12 months and quite frankly figured I would apply the approach of ‘fake it ’til you make it’. After 12 months I had to make a decision to return back to my role in HR or accept the transformation role permanently.

    I really resonated with your recent blog because I had to make a decision. I chose to stay permanently in the transformation role because I felt like I had outgrown the HR role with the experiences over the last 12 months. And whilst my boss obviously see’s something in me, I still struggled to know if I’d made the right decision and would achieve what was needed for the business. To be honest, I still feel like a bit of an imposter in this role if that makes sense… 🙂 I sat on this over time and have come to the conclusion that it’s kind of ok to feel this way, provided I be honest, admit what I don’t know but also know that i’m doing as much as i can to make it work and making a difference as I go. And if it doesn’t, whats the worst that can really happen? it won’t be the end of the world, but at least I’ll know I tried my hardest and would feel proud of myself for giving it a shot.

    anyway – hope that helps – love your work – thanks for the inspiration 🙂

    Jo

  • Tracey Wostikow says:

    I’m an older horse enthusiasts and have recently decided to start a young horse I breed. Kept thinking this is silly your a grandma now don’t risk it. After an honest discussion with family they encouraged me knowing full well this was my passion. It’s going great guns and challenges me daily to get out there. We all need to be challenged I think to help us develop be proud and satisfied
    Cheers Tracey Wostikow

  • I partnered with a global health and wellness company and I am so passionate about superfood nutrition and cleansing and what it has done for me and for my family. I thoroughly enjoy coaching people to look and feel their best but not everyone is ready to be coached. Issues always come up and at times I have questioned both my ability and whether this is worth the strain coaching can place on relationships. I am always learning new approaches in how to work with different personalities and issues. I have found that with a heart to serve and 2 ears to listen most can be resolved and witnessing a break through for anyone is such a rush.
    I love your 5 questions and you!

  • Samantha King says:

    Yes ! 95 % of the time I do as it is just in my nature to do so ! But sometimes if its a seriously tough awful situation it can be very hard to do so if you are not in a good place because of the issue !! But with me its not long before I try to put a positive spin on the situation again ! : )
    Cheers Sam K

  • Vanessa Maguire says:

    Hi Turia, my moment was when I took 4 years out of my working life (as a single mother) to go to uni full time to complete a dual bachelor degree. I’m now working full time as a teacher.
    So many times I questioned myself but I knew it was the right move for myself and my daughter – as my aunt said “the time is going to go by anyway-may as well do something with it”.
    Cheers

    Vanessa

  • Liz Riordan says:

    Turia- I’ve just read your quote in this mths Country Style article ” I’d rather take a crack at it and fail than not even try at all”. I’m a nearly 70yr old, training w friends for (1st ever) Gr. Ocean Rd 1/2 marathon in 3 wks time. We’ve just done 18kms this morn. I’m going to write your quote on my hand as inspiration before the run. Thank you for your inspiration Turia. Best wishes, Liz R

  • Sam P says:

    Hi Turia,

    Thanks for your regular doses of awesomeness! They always seem to pop into my inbox at the right time, with the right message! Unreal!

    I think you’re an absolute fire cracker, and I look to you as such an inspiration in so many ways – one of many reasons being that you have just mastered your own thoughts and have such clarity over who you are and why you do the things that you do! It’s amazing, and so refreshing.

    This whole ‘right decision’ process is so relevant for me right now!

    I’m coming out of 5 years of CHAOS, in life, work, family – everything, where my calendar has been booked up for months in advance and there has been so many amazing expeirences alongside stressful ones and I feel like it’s flown by in a flash, with barely any time to stop and enjoy the good as it’s been a constant rush from one thing to the next. I really am determined to take control in 2018 with more reflection and space, and less ‘blind doing’. I don’t want to have to wait 3 months to be able to catch up with friends, and I don’t want my calendar booked up for months on end, I want spontaneity and less stress, more go with the flow! The issue I have here, is I have 3 relatively large commitments that I am unbelievably passionate about, and the reality is that with family and social life to balance, I’m way overcomitted. Letting go of any of these three committments physically pains me. So I’m in the processing of making a decision to either let one go, or commit to continuing with them with a structure that is going to allow me to switch off and ‘smell the roses’ as well.

    My 3 large commitments (outside of family of a FIFO hubby & two kids, and friends) are;

    – Work (5 days – 30 hours p/w – pays the bills, great company but working in an area that isn’t fuelling my passion anymore, have been there 10 years, recently got a promotion, a lot of positive but also feels like it’s taking me away from what I’m truly passionate about)
    – My NFP foundation that was started 12 months ago and has gained some incredible traction and will require a lot more work over the coming 12m as we further engage with the local government and relevant health professionals to continue to grow this and help more people (approx 10 hours p/w)
    – Uni (10 hours p/w – studying in the area relevant to my NFP so I can make a career out of it one day!)

    I (can’t!!??) let any of these go. But something needs to change. These 3 items all tick your checklist boxes above (proud of myself, making those who love me proud, helping me to move forward with what I’m passionate about and more than happy to have it all plastered across a public platform!)

    This decision making process is driving me insane. I just need to make the decision, so that I can commit to it, and get on with it!

    Maybe the ‘go with the flow’ life just isn’t for me? Maybe I need to embrace my chaos!? I consider myself an extroverted introvert, so I go go go and love getting involved and giving my all, but then I need time in to just recharge and refuel myself to be able to get up and go again. This is difficult when there just aren’t enough hours in the day to do all things I want to do! And the time I find to stop and recharge, is the time I need to be spending with my family and friends (which I don’t find refuelling at all – I need me time/time in my own brain! to achieve that!).

    Any advice oh wise one!?

    Love your work – and HUGE congrats on your beautiful baby! So, so sweet x

    Sam x

  • julie sheppard says:

    Hi turia,I’ve decided I’m going to run in my first marathon next year,I’ve always had a fear of failure.One of my strategies i have taken on thanks to you is when things get to hard you gotta dig deep and when it gets harder you gotta dig deeper,you inspire me to push my self further than what I realise I can achieve,thank you amazing lady xx

  • Dear Hoskins Family — happy holidaze! You’ve got the best gift ever with your beautiful son. However, I want to comment on your X-Mas card. Turia, please do not turn into an elf full time. I’d really miss your inspiring messages and posts, unless you became a motivational elf. A part time elf would be okay. Seriously, have a great holiday, and I love the card. Peace and love!

    Darcy Spitz

  • Mikael MS says:

    Hi Turia! Jesus Christ bless you and your baby and husband! Im happy for you!!

  • Liz Russell says:

    Thanks Turia, I love that advice – that there are no ‘right decisions’, it is about reflecting how you may feel about it, then backing yourself and just go for it. I feel too many times I have thought too much about ‘is this the right thing to do’ and worried about the consequence or doubted my ability, rather than just getting on with it and believing in myself. Happy holidays to you and your gorgeous family, Liz

  • Di Harradence says:

    Hi Turia,
    Thanks for your blog. You really are an exceptional young woman with a very wise head on your shoulders!
    My husband and I are in our mid to late 60s. We have lived in the same house for 35 years and have always dreamed of moving down South, actually where you live to be precise.
    Brian has Parkinson’s and I am being treated for metastatic breast cancer in my liver. I am on oral chemo and am feeling great. Very active etc
    We have kids in Sydney and 4 gorgeous grandkids.
    We really want to sell and move but its such a big decision!!
    I know we will love living down there near the ocean where I love to be. We have friends there and its not that far for us to come to Sydney or family to visit.
    So why am I so anxious about taking the BIG step??
    Its driving me nuts but your check list is fabulous!!
    Hugs
    Di xx
    p.s .. that bubba of yours is adorable!! Biggest congrats x

  • lara says:

    Thank you Turia,
    Actually, I am facing a difficulty to cope in a new job. I m obligate to stay because I didn’t find something better, each minute I think that I want to leave the job but I don’t because I think that I need money and that I can overcome my fears at this job. for the others it s simply easy to answer me that I SHOULD stay. however for me it s a challenge that I have to made everyday. the fact of waking up every morning and going there is a decision that I feel obligate to do it, meanwhile I have to make this job a good decision to me.

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